Is it possible to submit the update for review, but not have it released immediately after it gets approved
Yes. It's possible to do so.
When submitting your app for review on App Store Connect, simply select the option to manually release the app instead of automatically release. This way, once the app is approved by Apple, it is kept at hold for release on the App Store until approved by the developer. You are also notified by email by once the app update is approved.
Refer to the following linked App Store Connect Help documentation pages:
If you choose to manually release a version when you submit your app for review, you can release the version after it’s approved and the status changes to Pending Developer Release. If you have an app in the Pending Developer Release state for longer than 30 days, you’ll receive an email reminder from Apple.
In the Version Release section, select a release option: