You’ve done a pretty good job so far of troubleshooting this yourself and there are many things that prevent sleep out of the box and by design.
What I would do next is exactly what you’re asking about - a targeted check to see if an application is what’s stopping your Mac from going to sleep.
To do this, follow these steps:
- The next time your Mac isn’t going to sleep, open Activity Monitor
- Click on the Energy tab
- Now you’ll see a list of applications with a number of columns, one of which should be headed “Preventing Sleep”
- Now check to see if any applications have a “Yes” listed in this column
IMPORTANT: If an application has an expansion triangle to the left of its name, make sure you expand it to confirm whether anything is preventing your Mac from going to sleep. For example, web browsers such as Safari often have multiple windows/tabs open and one of these could be preventing your Mac from going to sleep. However, this will not be obvious unless you click on the expansion triangle.
- If so, you can force them to Quit by selecting them and pressing optioncommandQ
- Now wait to see if your Mac will go to sleep
Notes:
- If you don’t see a “Preventing Sleep” column at Step 3, then go to View > Columns > Preventing Sleep to display it.
- If no applications are listed as preventing sleep, then let me know via the comment box below and we'll proceed with other steps.
For people that like command line options - there is an assertions log that shows what is going on - things that make the Mac think you are active, things that will block sleep, etc...
pmset -g assertions
This is the same information that the activity monitor shows, just more detail and you can see items come and go by letting the log run:
pmset -g assertionslog
One nice thing about command line is you can ignore everything that doesn't have "sleep" in it:
pmset -g assertionslog|grep -i sleep