On windows, the software I'd most highly recommend is [TouchCopy][1]. 

On mac, the software I'd most highly recommend is [PhoneView][2].

They seem to be the best supported, best value, and very full featured to add many useful tools once you've conquered music to and from your iOS device.

  [1]: http://www.wideanglesoftware.com/touchcopy/index.php
  [2]: http://www.ecamm.com/mac/phoneview/