macOS and iOS and iPadOS do not prevent split tunneling ever. That just is a routing choice that you can make when you choose your network setup. Apple has also designed robust per application VPN API and SDK, but your chosen apps have to implement that design for it to work. I don’t think Firefox cares to implement code using Apple’s design, complicating your needs rather than simplifying them.
Your problem is the people running the VPN are restricting your choices or not exposing the complexity since they believe people will mess up and complain. It’s their business to run and supporting people is very expensive if you do it well. Simplifying offerings is a valid business objective IMO.
Per-application VPN are tricky to grok for many and worse, browsers often don’t or respect the system DNS and proxy settings. Tracing actual network packets is also very opaque, technical and hard to verify your setup is correct and not leaking traffic to other interfaces. Much simpler is to run those apps in a VM is you really need total control over routing.
Without specific details on your research, your needs or your budget and skills, I hesitate to offer more than general advice above which is from my experience. (Also, shopping questions are off topic, so I’m choosing to steer this to a technical discussion and not helping you find a provider or replace their pre-sales support team’s job to assist you in your buying decision.)