My wife bought a new iPhone 8 and her text alerts work for everyone in her contacts except me. I've checked the phone, and hide alerts is not activated, and do not disturb is not turned on. There are no moon icon's anywhere to disable. When I text her, the little dot next to the message in her message list isn't there to signify a new text. We've tried switching on the DND and then turning it off, switching on hide alerts for that conversation only and then turning it off. Powered the phone off and on, deleted and re-added my contact to her contacts - nothing works. Any suggestions?

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    Welcome to Ask Different :) Please consider editing your post to specify the version of iOS running on your wife's iPhone 8. Also specify if your wife is using any other Apple device(s) logged in with the same Apple ID as on the iPhone 8.
    – Nimesh Neema
    Commented Sep 4, 2018 at 15:43

2 Answers 2


Did you add yourself as a new contact then choose what ringtone you want and text tone? Alert tones is on, and vibration?


Im sure you checked to make sure you are not blocked by going to Phone app, Recents, finding your number then scrolling down to see Block or unBlock this number. I do not know very much about Wi-Fi Calling, but check to see it that is on. Then check Messages to see if iMessages is on, because it could be set to use your Apple ID that you can be reached at. Or if you are in a separate list of people not in the contacts list and being filtered. I also just now noticed a setting in Messages Audio Messages with option of Raise to Listen and Expire after 2min or 30days. Then check Messenger if she has it.

  • Thank you so much for the suggestions! Yes, I added myself as a new contact and assigned a separate alert tone with the hopes it would fix things. I did not check to see if I'm blocked though. I just texted my wife to ask her to do this (we'll see when she actually notices). iMessages is definitely on, but I'm not sure what settings are in place for our Apple IDs. Will also investigate the raise to listen option. I'll let you know if that works...
    – Kristen
    Commented Sep 6, 2018 at 16:01

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