Som there are a couple of past questions with answers on this topic here and the bigger interwebs. My reason for re-opening this issue is that most answers are from around 2013 - 2015 latest. So I am wondering if there has been an update since.
early apple forum that claims success of 16RAM on mid 2010, 15' when booting in safe mode: https://discussions.apple.com/thread/2763468?start=105&tstart=0
comments claim that upgrade to 16G RAM was a success (end 2015): https://www.ifixit.com/Answers/View/148841/16+GB+possible+with+OS+X+Mountain+Lion+or+Mavericks
last answer claims that the only way to do this is by installing linux: https://www.ifixit.com/Answers/View/151681/I'm+experiencing+random+kernel+panics
Mid 2010 can go up to 12G RAM: https://apple.stackexchange.com/a/214900/223701
I would really, REALLY like to use 16Gb RAM since my computing demands are quite high. Anybody have any definitive stories? Thanks!