I have been trying for months to log into my iTunes account on my iPad but my usual choices of passwords are not working. When choosing "forgot my password" it wants to email me at an old Verizon.net address that has been long disabled. Before arriving at the security questions it prompts me for my birthdate, of which it too says is invalid...I'm at a loss. I know my birthdate is correct but I am stuck. Is there any way to find out the password when the email it is tied to is long gone? I even attempted to start over by creating an entirely new Apple account but I can't reset my iPad without the old password. Aargh! Please help
You can contact Apple via Apple Support. Select "More Products and Services" followed by "Apple ID". On the following page you asked to choose a topic, select "Other Apple ID Topics" followed by "Lost or Forgotten Apple ID Password". You will then be asked if you would like an Apple support specialist to contact you, or if you would like to schedule a call at a later date.
I suspect they are going to ask you a series of billing related questions to verify your identity. If they are able to verify your identity, you should be able to provide them an alternate email for the password reset link.
Good Luck :)
Apple's official instructions for recovering a forgotten password are available here: http://support.apple.com/en-us/HT201487
Unfortunately, if you are unable to get into your account using any of those methods then you will have sacrificed your account.
Apple also has instructions for restoring your iPad to factory defaults through iTunes: http://support.apple.com/en-us/HT201252