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I gave my old iPad to an ex, and before doing so, I deleted all content and reset. I think she may be seeing my iMessages and e-mails. Is this possible?

I used to use the Wi-Fi in her apartment for both new iPad, my iPhone, and old iPad she now has. If I use Find my iPhone to list devices from my iPhone, all 3 devices show up, but the old iPad shows offline. Is there a way of checking what devices have access without asking her obviously?

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No, unless she is using your Apple-ID this will not be possible.
As your old iPad appears offline, this probably is not the case. You can delete your old iPad from the Find my iPhone app in order to tidy up the list, this won't disable any Apple-ID on her iPad though, should that still be on there. If you reset the device though and didn't set up the iPad with YOUR Appe-ID then you're good to go.
Also: notice that when a new device starts using your Apple ID, Apple will send you an email notifying you about that. So you can also check that even for now and in future.

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  • Thanks so much for quick response. Now I'm worried I couldn't set up with her Apple ID and used mine. We were still together at that time. And just changed to her e-mail account for her. Don't think I'd get notification from Apple then as it would still show as my I pad. I use ipad and I phone and don't get a notification when I'd being used on either one? – user65980 Dec 29 '13 at 19:01
  • I should add that usually iMessage will never download old messages before its activation on a particular device. (It's stupid stupid stupid, but helpful in your case!) You would get an email if she used iMessage with your ID now, one can enable different send and receive addresses per device under ONE Apple ID account for FaceTime and iMessage, however to be frank I think it'd be better to tell her to use her own ID, as the activation of other addresses and numbers is just a tick away in the settings needing no authentication. – Glassed Silver Dec 29 '13 at 19:21

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