This seems like it should be simple, but I've googled and gooled and still can't find an answer.
How can I change the System font color on Mac OS X 10.6.7?
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Apple removed official support for "skinning" Mac OS X aeons ago. The only changes that you can make easily involve installing new icon sets.
There is no way to do this short of hacking binary files.
Try TinkerTool, it might be something that can change the setting you want.